Written Wednesday Feb. 19, 2014
God has given me a different perspective. I came home discouraged and so very tired. My mind wanted to lead me down an old familiar path of self-pity, anger and frustration. My emotions were quite ready to fast track me there, flying and colorful! I took time to myself, knowing I would not be good company! As I lay there, the Holy Spirit kept reeling me in and soon I had a very different perspective….. a heavenly perspective.
The earlier part of my day was filled with challenges and discouragement. After leaving Silas to pick me on his return from Kisumu, I went to my have my hair done. After finishing my hair, three hours later and still no Silas, I called my husband, only to find out that he had never made it to Kisumu. The “new” to us, vehicle had broken down on the way.
This incident happening after two months of countless attempts to fix our Pajero and two years of a lorry that broke down more often than it ran. We incurred such a huge loss on the Lorry’s sale and even had someone try and cheat us out of a very large chuck of money in the process. I was bitter and fed up!
After having to wait one hour for the Pajero that was supposed to be finally fixed and finished, on the drive home it ran out of gas, leaving me stranded with not much money and a driver I didn’t know. With no alternative, I ended up waiting in the vehicle by myself in the middle of the bush in Kenya! Not impressed, and it was almost dark! Once safely home I had to gather funds from Connie to pay back the driver and for his help and ride home.
So it was with this frustrated heart that I closed myself in my room, and pondered and meditated with the Lord. It was then that a new perspective was revealed. The Holy Spirit began whispering to my heart that these circumstances and frustrations would be considered such a big loss if my goal was, what I could get out of life but thankfully my life is so much more than that. My life is much more glorious than that! My life is so much more than making sure things go well, I live with eternal purposes set before me. Lives are being saved from hell, the lame are walking the sick are being healed and people spending eternity in the light and love of Christ.
The Holy Spirit reminded me of Phil 3:7
“But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus, my Lord, of whom I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish that I may gain Christ.
Later as I was meditating on all that the Spirit of the Lord was saying, I felt a presence come and curl up beside me. I felt a breeze and so clearly that an angel had come to refresh my soul. I was so touched that God would care so much as to send His angel to comfort me.I felt a wing around me, as God’s peace and comfort washed over me…..I began to ponder, could this be the Holy Spirit….My Comforter……. How beautiful…..